After spending several consecutive days indoors, I finally decided to venture outside, donning my stylish autumn attire to showcase my personal fashion sense. However, my excitement quickly dissipated when I was met with an icy blast of cold air that sent shivers down my spine. It felt as if I had walked straight into the frozen climate of a butcher's refrigerator. Let's just say that I learned my lesson instantly. So, now that reality has set in and we bid farewell to the fleeting beauty of autumn and acknowledge our incomplete enjoyment of the season, it's time to bundle up and confront the imminent arrival of winter head-on.
And that brings me to my current state of mind, a space of reflection as I go through life changes. One thought that crossed my mind was whether I truly embody the optimistic person I claim to be. This introspection led me to explore a different perspective on optimism in this week's blog post - As an optimist living in my glass house, optimism is practically my middle name! I understand it to be a beacon of positivity, a guiding light in the face of adversity, and a trait admired in our society. But is optimism a fair-weather friend? Can it be relied upon when unexpected challenges come our way, or does it crumble under the weight of reality? Can it be trusted, or is it just a friend that offers support only when the sun is shining and abandons us when stormy weather rolls in? These thoughts have traveled through my mind as I ponder why the bright side of life appears distant and my inherent sense of optimism wavers in the face of life's troubles. I have questioned its reliability and asked if it's that friend that helps us stay in a delusion of reality.
Reflection and Reality
Upon reflection, I have come to realize that optimism alone is not enough. While optimism is admirable in theory, excessive optimism can actually be detrimental to our mental health. It's important to acknowledge and accept that there will be times when we feel pessimistic, when the weight of the world seems overwhelming. Suppressing these negative emotions in favor of unrelenting optimism can lead to a disconnection from reality. The National Library of Medicine featured Psychiatric Bulletin and discussed the danger of "Excessive Optimism." (McGuire-Snieckus) While acknowledging the benefits of optimism, they also noted that individuals who are excessive in their optimism run the risk of participating in risky actions in the long run. In a nutshell, humans tend to make risky decisions as a result of overconfidence, and being overly optimistic about a situation isn't always the best decision. We ought to learn to embrace pockets of pessimism or, to put it plainly, face reality for what it is at a given time, and frankly, those pockets are not beautiful; they are scary and even unbearable sometimes.
So, how can we ensure that we don't rely solely on excessive optimism? How can we strike a balance between embracing positivity while also recognizing the reality of the challenges we face?
- One practical approach is to acknowledge the issues that arise in our lives. Instead of dismissing them or trying to put a positive spin on everything, we should allow ourselves to fully acknowledge and understand the difficulties we are facing. By doing so, we can gain a clearer perspective and avoid blindly relying on optimism as a coping mechanism.
- In addition, sharing our struggles with trusted individuals can provide us with much-needed support and perspective. It's important to have a network of people who can listen and offer guidance during challenging times. By opening up and expressing our concerns, we allow ourselves to release some of the pressure that comes with trying to maintain a relentless optimistic outlook.
- Furthermore, allowing ourselves to feel a range of emotions, including pessimism, is essential for our overall well-being. Suppressing negative emotions in the pursuit of unwavering optimism can be harmful in the long run. It's okay to feel sad, frustrated, or even angry at times. By acknowledging and accepting these emotions, we can work through them and find our way back to a more positive mindset.
- Lastly, seeing the trying time as a catalyst for growth, setting realistic goals, and being accountable for them with ourselves or the support system we may have.
The truth is, optimism doesn't mean that we have to be happy all the time or ignore the difficulties in life. It doesn't mean that we have to wear rose-colored glasses and pretend that everything is perfect. Just as seasons change, so does our emotional landscape. Our goal is not to lie to ourselves, overestimate our abilities, or neglect important warnings, which can hurt our chances of recovering in a timely manner. Instead, our goal is to walk in the humanness of ourselves, balance emotions, be practical along the way, and still be optimistic.
With that being said, it is crucial to avoid allowing pessimism to become a permanent residence.
However, it's also important to note that settling into pessimism is not the answer. While it may be tempting to wallow in negativity, allowing ourselves to be consumed by pessimistic thoughts for an extended period only leads to stagnation. We must face our pessimism head-on, confront the harsh realities of life, and then work our way back to a place of positivity and hope.
Verdict
So, is optimism a fair-weather friend? The answer is: Yes, no, and maybe.
No - It is not a fleeting emotion that deserts us when life gets tough. Rather, it is a mindset that is nurtured and cultivated through understanding, acceptance, and balance. It is a companion that reminds us of our inner strength and resilience. It allows us to see beyond the dark clouds and find hope even in the most difficult circumstances.
Yes - Optimism can desert us when life gets tough, when the challenges seem insurmountable. But that doesn't mean we should abandon it altogether. After all, life is a mix of good and bad, of sunny days and stormy weather.
Maybe - Optimism can also be a double-edged sword. Maybe it is not about always maintaining a positive outlook, but rather about finding the strength to stay positive in the face of adversity.
Conclusion
Perhaps my assessment of optimism is unfair. After all, it is not a bulletproof shield that protects us from all adversity. It is what we make of it, and life is a complex tapestry of experiences. It is crucial that we embrace both optimism and pessimism along the way. So, the next time you find yourself questioning the reliability of optimism in the face of challenges, remember that it is okay to feel pessimistic at times. Embrace the full spectrum of emotions and trust that optimism will return when the time is right.
Finally! Despite the chilly weather that day, I made the decision to brave the cold and wear my stylish outfit. However, now that I got that out of the way, I can happily retreat back into the comfort of my sweatpants and cozy sweaters. As we enter winter, my hope is that the frosty temperatures won't dampen our spirits but instead serve as a reminder to seek warmth in all aspects of life. And rest assured, I'll be back soon with more content to keep you warm this season of Thanksgiving and throughout the upcoming holiday festivities. Have a beautiful Sunday.
Citation:
McGuire-Snieckus, Rebecca. “Hope, Optimism and Delusion.” Psychiatric Bulletin (2014), U.S. National Library of Medicine, Apr. 2014, www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4115405/.
